Is it me?

Today I have a heavy heart. Since I was diagnosed and even before, Fibromyalgia has affected my life ~ but I've tried not to let it affect my life in a negative way. Today I feel as if it has. Or maybe I'm using Fibromyalgia as a scapegoat and the problem really is me. Is this who I am?

I feel hopeless and I'm having trouble concentrating on much. Drawing seems to help - but holding a pen for too long starts causing pain in my hands. The distraction is so welcome though that I've been willing to work through the pain, or maybe it's work with the pain.

I have a show this weekend and I'm having trouble concentrating on the many things that need to get done. I could have a poor showing for a show that I've worked really hard for. I feel as if depression is setting in... I'm trying to keep my head above water. I just feel like I'm drowning.

What a downer post. Just logging both positive and negative.