A new week

It's a new week - but I feel the same. In fact... I dare say, I feel worse. Things are really eating at me. I keep telling myself I need to get over it... but it's all so personal. I'm deeply sad. I also feel alone in dealing with everything. I guess it's because I am. Only I can understand what I'm going through. That becomes more and more apparent everyday.

End of the week

This has been a very hard week for me. Kasey has been working long hours, I am filled with sadness and I have a craft show to prepare for. Balancing everything with the demands of the kids is difficult to say the least.

This heavy sadness is taking it's toll on me. I'm unable to concentrate, I'm forgetting things and I'm unmotivated to do the things that need to get done. I feel as if what I do is inadequate - but I'm not sure how to fix it. I feel near tears every day.

Is the fibromyalgia or is it just me. I'm hoping it passes soon. As the week progresses, my pains are getting greater. Last night I had to stop drawing because I could barely hold the pencil. Am I doing this to myself?

I still have one more day until the weekend. Of course, it sounds like Kasey will be working on the weekend so I'm not sure how much of a break I'll be getting. I know I can do it though - I just need to keep telling myself it isn't going to kill me.

Is it me?

Today I have a heavy heart. Since I was diagnosed and even before, Fibromyalgia has affected my life ~ but I've tried not to let it affect my life in a negative way. Today I feel as if it has. Or maybe I'm using Fibromyalgia as a scapegoat and the problem really is me. Is this who I am?

I feel hopeless and I'm having trouble concentrating on much. Drawing seems to help - but holding a pen for too long starts causing pain in my hands. The distraction is so welcome though that I've been willing to work through the pain, or maybe it's work with the pain.

I have a show this weekend and I'm having trouble concentrating on the many things that need to get done. I could have a poor showing for a show that I've worked really hard for. I feel as if depression is setting in... I'm trying to keep my head above water. I just feel like I'm drowning.

What a downer post. Just logging both positive and negative.