So this weekend, we started me on my medication again (Welbutrin & Ultram) with the hopes that it will stop my gradual decline. I hate taking medication... especially when I'm not seeing a significant change. This is why after awhile, I stop taking it. Well that, and the fact that I can't seem to remember to take it. I've heard forgetfulness is a symptom so it's really not my fault. Of course, everything seems to be a symptom.
Anyhow, I'm not feeling any significant changes. Today I was doing fine (read: normal - flu like aches, sporadic nausea and fatigue). We spent the day down south in Redmond having lunch and shopping. I made it just fine. When we got home, I sat down on the couch to watch the kids play and to relax a bit. That is where I stayed for several hours until Kasey came home.
As soon as I settled in, I got extremely drowsy (at times, unable to open my eyes), my legs began getting pains up and down them, and a headache started to form. It was probably around 4:00, so timing is normal. I feel like since I've been on the medications for four days, I shouldn't have had this severe of an episode. Not to say that this is as bad as it gets, because it obviously could get much worse... however, after having almost a week of help with the kids, allowing my body time to rest and the added medications, I don't feel like this should have happened.
So, now I sit alone in my room... in bed. I love my bed, unless I have to be in it. I want to get up and do something but I know my legs would give way. I'm still going to give the medication a fair amount of time, but it's looking like this combination is no longer working for me.
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Monday, March 17, 2008
Not the normal mom
Today, I finally had the opportunity to spend some time in Robbie's classroom. A friend took Alyssa for a few hours so I could help the teacher out.
My day started very challenging. I have been feeling awful lately... part of it is allergies - or a mild sinus infection, part of it is my body pains, part of it is the lack of sleep I've been getting and part of it is the nausea that seems to plague me in the mornings (no, I'm not pregnant).
Despite my ailments, I made it into Robbie's classroom and realized that I live a very different life than so many others. While I struggled to get myself out of bed and the kids gathered to leave the house, other moms knew that today was St. Patties Day and they did fun and appropriate things for their children. It even took me about five kids wearing full green and two parents parading around in green gaudy necklaces before the light bulb went off. All I could do was be thankful that Robbie loves dinosaurs. He was wearing his Walking With Dinosaur shirt that had a green dinosaur on it. I felt like such a loser mom. The only consolation was that Robbie didn't care... he was just happy to have me in his classroom.
I made it through the classroom experience and managed to pick Lyssie up from the friend. I made a bad choice when I thought I could get an errand in before picking up Robbie. I had the pillowcases in my hand and ready to pay when a severe dizzy spell hit me. With Lyssie asleep in the stroller and the fact that we were at least a ten minute drive from home, I put everything down and headed for the car hoping the spell would pass. I sat in the car until I felt well enough to drive.
I had to come straight home and call my friend to pick up Robbie from school. It's really irritating to me that I can't be a normal mom. Instead, I sat home, on the couch, watching Lyssie build the train track while Robbie played his zoo game on the computer. I don't like that I have moments where I have to be a mom that doesn't participate. I'm a sideline mom on my worse days and I feel like my kids get the bad end of the deal.
Kasey's parents will be in town at the end of this week. I've decided to give the medications a try again while I have someone here to take the kids if the medication affect me adversely. I hate going back onto medications.
My day started very challenging. I have been feeling awful lately... part of it is allergies - or a mild sinus infection, part of it is my body pains, part of it is the lack of sleep I've been getting and part of it is the nausea that seems to plague me in the mornings (no, I'm not pregnant).
Despite my ailments, I made it into Robbie's classroom and realized that I live a very different life than so many others. While I struggled to get myself out of bed and the kids gathered to leave the house, other moms knew that today was St. Patties Day and they did fun and appropriate things for their children. It even took me about five kids wearing full green and two parents parading around in green gaudy necklaces before the light bulb went off. All I could do was be thankful that Robbie loves dinosaurs. He was wearing his Walking With Dinosaur shirt that had a green dinosaur on it. I felt like such a loser mom. The only consolation was that Robbie didn't care... he was just happy to have me in his classroom.
I made it through the classroom experience and managed to pick Lyssie up from the friend. I made a bad choice when I thought I could get an errand in before picking up Robbie. I had the pillowcases in my hand and ready to pay when a severe dizzy spell hit me. With Lyssie asleep in the stroller and the fact that we were at least a ten minute drive from home, I put everything down and headed for the car hoping the spell would pass. I sat in the car until I felt well enough to drive.
I had to come straight home and call my friend to pick up Robbie from school. It's really irritating to me that I can't be a normal mom. Instead, I sat home, on the couch, watching Lyssie build the train track while Robbie played his zoo game on the computer. I don't like that I have moments where I have to be a mom that doesn't participate. I'm a sideline mom on my worse days and I feel like my kids get the bad end of the deal.
Kasey's parents will be in town at the end of this week. I've decided to give the medications a try again while I have someone here to take the kids if the medication affect me adversely. I hate going back onto medications.
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